Saturday, February 8, 2014

It's Okay to be Single on Valentine's Day

Hearts day 2014
instagram photo | @sosweetsuzette

Valentine's Day sure is one of the loveliest holidays of the year. And because we are just few days away from the very special day, people's Facebook status posts are now about that day. Couples say they can't wait to spend time with their partners while single men and women say they are now looking for V-day dates.

But do we really need partners on valentine's day?

I just went through a break-up. And I guess, I'm still in the process of letting go, accepting and moving on. It was a long four years. And it's four years of my life I didn't regret. When I told my friends about what happened, their common reaction was, "Sayang dugay na mo" (It's a waste, you two were together for a long time). And yes, maybe, several people did not see this coming. I was one of them. I was one of those people who believed that a long-term relationship could stand the test of having a long-distance relationship. But no, they were wrong. We were wrong. I was wrong.
Thinking things over made me realize a lot of things. I realized that you should not try saving the relationship just because you think it would be such a waste to throw away your wonderful memories together. No, you are not throwing away memories when you end a relationship. You keep the memories with you, and they will always have a place in your mind, and perhaps your heart. And while it feels good holding on to memories, there might just be better moments out there waiting for you to be experienced.

Yet, you choose to stay because you are content with what you have. I realized that being content and being happy are two different things. You can be somewhat happy when you're content. But when you are happy, you are always contented.

I realized that feeling sorry for the 'other' person sometimes becomes the reason why you don't end the relationship. We must put in mind that being in love and feeling sorry are another two different things. Wouldn't you be more sorry holding on to that person even if the feelings are gone? Wouldn't letting go be a better idea?
I realized that sometimes good things come to an end. And putting an end to a thing might be just the good decision you can make, not for anybody else, but for yourself. An end to something good might be the start of something better.

I realized that being single doesn't mean being unloved. It simply means you are gearing up for something that will come to you at the right time. It might even be with the same person you loved before, just this time, it's the right time, and things will be better because you know you've grown - to be more mature, more responsible. And when that time comes, you know you are ready for it. You know you deserve it. You know it's for you.

I realized that nobody can make you happier but yourself. You are in charge of your own happiness. You do not need a partner on valentine's day. And yes, it's okay to be single on valentine's day. <3

“It hurts to let go. Sometimes it seems the harder you try to hold on to something or someone the more it wants to get away. You feel like some kind of criminal for having felt, for having wanted. For having wanted to be wanted. It confuses you, because you think that your feelings were wrong and it makes you feel so small because it's so hard to keep it inside when you let it out and it doesn't come back. You're left so alone that you can't explain. Damn, there's nothing like that, is there? I've been there and you have too. You're nodding your head.”
Henry Rollins, The Portable Henry Rollins